Growing in Grace

This past weekend was RUF's Winter Conference for all the Georgia schools. We brought 14 students from Kennesaw State down to Forsyth, GA for the weekend. The theme of this year's conference was "Growing in Grace." Worship sessions, prayer, seminars, dodgeball, and a bonfire were among the many activities of the weekend.

I had the privilege of leading a seminar for girls about our body image in light of God's grace. I called it "Mirror, Mirror on the wall." My prayer for my seminar was that the girls would come away from it thinking about the ways in which their body image is or can become an idol. We had two sessions, one Saturday morning and one Saturday evening. Both sessions went well. I wanted to convey the message that obsessing over our looks is our way of showing that we don't believe that we are loved enough, let alone infinitely loved by THE GOD OF THE UNIVERSE!! I also wanted to stress that beauty is more than what we look like.

In preparing for this talk, I learned a lot about the ways in which I struggle with finding myself beautiful. The Lord was teaching me, even as I was hearing myself talk. It's a beautiful thing to be able to encourage young women in the freedom the Gospel gives.

Overall, the weekend went well with no major obstacles. i hope that all the students and leaders have gone home encouraged and excited about the lifelong process of growing in grace.

Here's a picture of me and the girls on the night of the bonfire.

RUF and Tumble

I'm sorry it's taken so long for me to post an update. These past four weeks have been...I don't think there is one word that can encapsulate my sentiments. How about 4 words...

FAST. I've finally stopped writing 2009-just in time for February to make it's annual debut. The first week of January practically didn't exist because I slept through it. Explanation-I got my wisdom teeth removed. Let's just say that the ability to chew is a blessing! The beginning of each semester is always a fast-paced whirlwind. We plan for the semester, prepare small group materials, meet and pursue new students, and adapt to new schedules.

SORROWFUL. I'm assuming most of you have heard about the earthquakes in Haiti. I have over a dozen close relatives who live in Port-au-Prince, Haiti. I used to spend the summers in Haiti with my grandparents when I was younger. The pictures and footage of the devastation in Haiti is hard for anyone to look at. It was especially hard for me to see the, now unrecognizable, places I had been as a child and wonder if my family memebers were buried under the rubble. It was four days before I had news of all my family. No one was seriously hurt. THANK YOU, LORD! About half of them half left the country and come to live with some of us in the U.S. We don't know what God has planned for their lives, but I know that the Lord is in total control over this.

DYNAMIC. As much as I wanted to continue serving at Kennesaw State University, it just wasn't in God's plan for me. Several factors, including difficulty raising support, led me to the decision not to pursue a third year of this wonderful internship. I have already learned so much about ministry and myself and it's not over yet...hopefully. ($5000 in support still needed) I have decided to apply to a few seminaries to get a degree in Biblical counseling. My experience through RUF has confirmed and even intensified my desire to pursue this path. A lot is going to change this year.

EXCITING. At RUF Staff Training, we are told that interns tend to be more fruitful in their second year. I find this to be true of me. I used to dip my toe into the water and test it. Now, I can leap into deeper conversations with girls I have just met. It's liberating for both me and the girls. I'm here for God's kingdom work and it's so exciting to see all that He is doing. I can't wait to tell you more!

Hello 2010

Dear Friends,

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas celebration with your families and friends! I wish you a happy new year!

As I bid farewell to 2009 and welcome 2010, I want to thank you for your support in getting me this far. Let us remember that every passing moment in our lives is a blessing from the Lord.

Love,
Christina

No News is Good News

I simply cannot watch a newscast without my heart breaking a little each time. I wish I were exaggerating. Crimes are becoming more outrageous and headlines are becoming more ridiculous. Story after story of tragedies and scams bombard my mind. The weather is often the most light-hearted part of the 30-minute segments.

The news leaves me wanting to cry over the sad state of this broken world. The end of the newscast leave you with no hope other than the fact that you can watch it again tomorrow at the same time. The anchors close the show with smiles painted on their face, smiles so deceiving that they almost seem genuine. But how can you genuinely smile after you've just spent the last 30 minutes recounting the worst headlines of the day?

I cannot imagine what it is like to sit there and watch the news without the hope of a future redemption. The truth is that I do not know the meaning of hopeless. After watching the news, that is one thing I can be thankful for.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1


*Note that the Biblical meaning of the word hope is not the same as the meaning we ascribe to it today. Check this out--> What is Hope?

Random Tandem

I've been feeling under the weather for almost a week with no progress. Bleh.

Here's a treat for your knowledge and mine from idiomsite.com: "under the weather" is an old sailor phrase. When men were sick, they would rest below deck and thus were literally "under" the weather on deck.

goenglish.com: Being "under the weather" reminds us that a quick change in the weather can affect our health and the way we feel.

Relationships Are Messy

I recently rediscovered my Red Hot Chili Peppers Greatest Hits CD. I have a distinct memory from several years ago when the song "Californication" came out on MTV. Every time I hear the song, I am thrown back into my old room in Miami. It's late at night…more like early in the morning. I am watching TV and I see this animated music video that looks like a video game. It has a catchy tune. I didn't understand the meaning behind the title "Californication."

It's one of those weird memories that has little bearing on the outcome of my life. But it's a vivid memory for whatever reason. Now, as I listen more closely to the lyrics of the song, I gain a different perspective and a greater respect for the title. The song describes the effects of all that Hollywood has to offer, or in this case not offer. Hollywood plants seeds of desire in us. Everything from perfect skin to muscular physiques to big homes to casual sex is glorified.

In talking with girls about life, the subject of "boys" is always sure to come up. I sit across from a girl as she tells me that she doesn't feel "good enough" for a certain guy. Another girl tells me that she is sure that she IS going to marry her current boyfriend even though he's "not there yet." Still another girl confesses that she's not sure she wants to continue dating her current boyfriend because he doesn't do all the things boyfriends "should do." It's no surprise that pornography places impossible expectations on women. We are not flawless. But what about the unrealistic expectations placed on men and women by the "hard core soft porn" that this song talks about?

In the media, romance and passion are glorified. Timing is always perfect. Major issues are resolved within hours. Love is wrongly defined as passion and attraction. Yes, passion and attraction are a part of the definition, but what about the choice to love someone who will undoubtedly let you down? Ladies and gentlemen, your partner will not do everything right. He or she will make you cry. He or she will forget something that means a lot to you. The difference between the one you should date/marry and the one you shouldn't date/marry is the heart. Does this person hate his or her own sin? Does this person care that they hurt you? Does this person desire to change?

Relationships, including those between friends and family, are messy. They are not a pretty, shiny box neatly tied together with a bow. The messiness is part of the beauty of the relationship. It's why marriage vows include "for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health." Forgiveness is just as beautiful as romance. Sanctification is beautiful. Overcoming obstacles together is beautiful. It's in Christ that we find the power to forgive and be sanctified and overcome. That is beautiful. That is love.

Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Patience

This past weekend, my church had it's annual missions conference. In addition to the testimonials of of several of the missionaries our church supports, we had a main speaker who preached each day on the attributes of God and their missional implications.

Firday night, he preached about the patience of God. He showed us how God was/is patient with Adam, the Amorites, the Israelites, the gentiles, believers, and nonbelievers. He showed us that God calls us to be patient with one another and that patience is a fruit of the Spirit. I thought to myself, "I think I've got that one down. I'm pretty good at being patient with others. I pretty good at giving people second and third chances." Obviously, pride and arrogance are still a struggle for me. Nonetheless, it was still a great sermon and there is still much to be learned about the patience of God and the patience He has for me in my sin every second of the day.

I had a twenty minute drive home to think about what I had just heard. I thanked God for the patience He has with me. Frustrated with my sinfulness, I finally got it. I am not patient. I don't always have patience for God. I don't have patience with myself. The Lord has more patience for me than I have for Him or myself.

Who am I that my judgement of myself should take precedence over my Creator's judgement of me? Who am I to say that I do or don't deserve punishments or blessings? Who am I to think that I know better than God?

Ah! The foolishness of man!

Though my lips say otherwise, my heart still sometimes believes there is such a thing as "good enough." No one is good enough. It's either you are good or you are evil. No one is good. That is why we have Jesus. He is good and His death is so that I may live without condemnation. (Romans 8:1) He took the penalty for my past, present, and future sins. God looks at me and sees Christ's perfection. That is grace and mercy. It's not a license to sin, but a freedom from it.

So, dear friends, have patience with each other, with God, and with yourself. Don't do it because you have to or even "should." Do it out of gratitude for the patience you have been given.

Wonderfully Exhausting

I just got back from RUF October training last week. About three times each year, we come together to learn, fellowship, and grow. On our nights off, we exchange stories and hugs. We crowd around long tables and enjoy each others' company. Training provides an atmosphere where we can have candid conversations that leave me deep in thought. It's wonderfully exhausting, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I come home from training and realize how much I crave (and thrive on) good debates and deep discussions, especially in small groups. I'm definitely a relational being. I want to hear people's ideas and examine their perspectives. I want my ideas and perspectives to be challenged. I want to be reminded, convicted, confused, and engaged by others.

To some extent, that is what I do with students. That's part of why I love this ministry God has called me to. It's all relational. But there is an aspect of having to hold some things back when it comes to students, an aspect that completely disappears in peer relationships. Hmmm...